Spider's Game: Chapter 15

                                            15

  The man turned off the radio , he had heard enough , he got up from his chair and began to walk up and down the room . When he was nervous , he could not sit still, so walked miles back and forth from wall to wall . He was nervous , sweaty. "I am an instrument of evil, became the pen of the devil ."
- What have I done? - Was repeating itself. He felt hot, he could hardly breathe , opened a window , took a breath of fresh air . Then he froze , sweat on his forehead had become ice.
He closed the window and walked on. His thoughts were all messed up , now had blood before his eyes, now saw himself again small . Now he stopped to read the title of the newspaper, and shivered .
- What have I done! - Now the phrase had become exclamatory .
He filled a glass of water, carried it to his mouth, but put it back immediately , was not thirsty . He began to walk. It is well vented walking. As he walked, he thought.
Those thoughts were hurting and behold who walked faster pace . Now they again saw a kid again , then suddenly had before if Piazza Pretoria , then appeared a cross , then blood.
He felt crazy.
He stopped walking , he knelt leaning his elbows on the armchair in which, shortly before , had sat down to follow the radio, and began to pray.
He recited a Hail Mary, then the Our Father. He broke off . She pressed his fingers on his temples , his eyes bright , she could not even breathe well because he had a nose full of mucus from crying angry that he was about to explode. He cried .
"What are you crying for? Now you're the devil's tool . It was not what you wanted ? "
" No, it was not what I wanted to happen "
" You make me sick ! You've always been so .. a weakling, a coward. "
" Yes , it is true , they are. But I did not want to end like this . "
"Stop with these feelings of guilt, you know that everything would be led into evil. This story is born from evil, and evil will die . "
"I, I. .. "
"You suck .. "
He did not know anything, did not want to think . Because the reasoning led him to these inner dialogues , which revealed more painful than a thousand glowing blades that penetrate the skin .
He sat down in an armchair. He stretched his legs, closed his eyes.

" Mich ! Mich ! What do you want to know about your father? Your father is a sailor on board, is always on board. Mich now go away, go play , then pass by Mrs. Tina and dinner from her.
Mich you understand who your father is ? But how can you know?
and they ran, ran faster than me and I was alone .
Mich still your father think? I told you I boarded that gives a fuck about us! If you thought about your poor mother instead! Go get the bread is already paid , go run Mich .. Mich run run .. run.

It was an instrument of evil. It was his life that required him . She wiped her tears. He stood up . Everything was over, everything was better now.
Mich Run , run!